doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
