They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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