The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
