just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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