Where is the hickey?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
