the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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