so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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