I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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