No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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