I'm jealous of your bromance
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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