she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
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