I'm eating all of the evidence.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
