didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
