I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
