I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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