he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
