I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
