how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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