he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize