I wish I could punch you in the face.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You left your phone here
Wait...
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
