How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
