do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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