I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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