This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
