Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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