Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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