he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
