final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Randomize
