She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
