for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
