And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
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