I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize