I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
