Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
