love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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