sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
