Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
