I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize