I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
