her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
