I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
