I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize