I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
