dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize