I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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