Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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