My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
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