I'm gonna have a badass scar
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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