He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
