barbara walters just said penis...
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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