More tranny stories later!
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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